Pantsboard Responses - September 2005
September 2005's Burning Question:
Given recent confirmation that Rare will be supporting the Nintendo DS, what projects do you hope or expect to see from us on this system? Is there anything you don't want to see?
  Aw man, that is SO awesome. I don't care how you guys have this loophole, but it's a good one.
     The DS screams for FPS support, so a Perfect Dark game would be SO awesome (the touchscreen/thumbstrap works great in Metroid Prime). Also, with the DS' wifi capabilties, it would DOMINATE if I could take on my friends in a game of Perfect Dark online. A Banjo racer in the vein of Diddy Kong Racing would be great too, and I bet Banjo-Kazooie would sell millions just looking at all the kids that like the DS.
     Thanks a lot for this. It's great to see that you're interested in what the fans want.
     Jamie
  Dear Hitler-esque, fashionable stick-figure:
     Nintendo fanboys rejoice at the news that their favourite technologically-inadequate handheld is supported by Rare! (Refer to the attached image of surprisingly high quality and relevance for a Pantsboard posting.)
     I believe the previous image sums up quite nicely what I wouldn't want to see on the DS. Has anyone actually enjoyed the experience of playing Super Mario 64 DS with the rubbish directional-pad controls or the intermittent touch-screen? (Cue an inordinate number of illogical, Nintendo fanboy responses in the affirmative.)
     It is in my opinion that you should continue to offer handheld puzzle games. This would allow you to occupy the gaming niche somewhere between Tetris and games that satisfy the cravings of people with a fetish for stick-figures sporting trendy Y-fronts with awkwardly placed nipples. It may just be the ticket for attracting those three gamers in said niche.
     I will close now - likely with many cries of: "Thank bloody God!" - on the note that 3D platform games belong on home consoles rather than handhelds. Mr. Pants, I sincerely hope you find time to sift through these "quirky" letters, as it must be difficult to get the ladies away from your pasty-white, rump-abundant self.
     lewdishLoki
Mr. Pants says:
Thanks for the - hey, wait... fashionable, but Hitler-esque; trendy, but freakish; a lady-magnet, but with a J-Lo rear end. Fella, I don't know whether to thank you or cuss you out.
  This is pretty much all I want to see on the DS from you guys. I want some Banjo games, a remake of Perfect Dark, a Conker game, a GoldenEye remake, Donkey Kong 64 DS, some kind of traditional Donkey Kong Country game with updated graphics and other cool stuff (like New Super Mario Bros.), a Mr. Pants sequel or another Sabre Wulf, and anything original and "Rare-like" you can think of. Oh yeah, while you're at it, I'd like a Spanish omelette to go please.
     Benjamin the Dragon
  I'd just like to start by saying how glad I am that despite your newfound celebrity you still find the time to personally answer letters from the fans. I mean, you could have let the phenomenal success of It's Mr. Pants go to your head, but thankfully you have remained humble. Bless you, Mr. Pants. Bless you.
     Okay, hopefully that'll be enough arse-frenching to get me through the door. Now, on to the topic at hand:
     I'd really love to see a sequel to Diddy Kong Racing on the DS (obviously without so much Diddy Kong). Elements like free-roaming exploration and boss battles have a lot of potential, and it would be a shame if they were never expanded upon. Plus, creating the game for the DS would allow you to make use of the wireless multiplayer.
     It would also be great to see Banjo-Kazooie on the DS. I'm sure you could have some fun with the two screens, either to split Banjo and Kazooie up for two-character puzzle solving, or else use it to expand the play area. Some touch oriented gameplay/mini games would also be welcome.
     Finally, let me add my voice to the many pleading cries that I'm sure you must be getting for a fourth Donkey Kong Country. The potential is enormous and I'm sure you lot could come up with something really special if only the powers-that-be would allow it to happen.
     Well, I think that's about it. Sabre Wulf seems an obvious choice for the DS, and I wouldn't be at all surprised if Touch! Mr. Pants is already in development by now, so I won't go into detail on them (and of the latter I'm sure you are grateful).
     Thanks for always listening,
     Tom (Frogstar)
  A sequel to BLAST CORPS!!!! Please look deep inside your pants and pull out a sequel to this game!!! DS would be perfect with the touch-screen, and you know it. You've probably been talking about it at your meetings too. Don't lie to me!
     Dennis "NoBullet" B
  Hullo Mr. Size XXXXXXL Lord of Pantification (pretty good, eh?)
     RARE will probably be incredibly sick of me by the time I can legally work for you--and by the time I have enough money for counseling while simultaneously working for you. Anyhoo, if there is any game you must make it is Banjo. With Pants cameos, of course. And, if the Banjo team isn't working on anything, go for a GbtG sequel--whenever I see that title, I feel the nagging little thorn of an unfinished ending prickle my being.
     Provided Nintendo thinks you're worthy of making games, you should see if they'll release their strait-jacket-like restraints on RARE making DK and Star Fox games. All the DK games now seem to have been made by monkeys! And I think you guys did a better job on SF than anyone else.
     Oh yes--and another Mr. Pants game! To prove to my parents that it actually exists! (Would you believe Best Buy didn't have it? Tch! Best Buy my arse!)
     BK GiRL
Mr. Pants says:
Evil Knievel! That's it, I'm cutting off the Teen Titans' supply of my deluxe quilted Crayon Snake thongs, and I don't care if that little green shapeshifting freak does come after me. No, wait, you said - oh man! I'm so confused.
  Greetings sir! About Rare DS games.
     I don't know if you guys still own the rights to WizarDS & Warriors, I think that was under Acclaim but I know Rare's name was stamped on it, I think the DS would be a great time to revive the franchise. That DS in W&W was witty no!? No…
     If not! I say an RC Pro-Am type game - the possibilities with actually having the Remote on the touch-screen, or even using the microphone with the WiFi connection to somehow to interact with the vehicles would be awesome. And it would probably be a great game to familiarize a DS team with the machine to make many, many more good DS games.
     Jonathan Carden
  What I like to see on the Nintendo DS:
     - Perfect Dark DS (I won't complain if it is a port of Perfect Dark 64.)
     - A Banjo DS game (Really loved these games. They were/are brilliant.)
     - A Kameo game (Also a really great game from Rare.)
     I think the DS is a great system for both games. It can be 3D with nice graphics. Also with the stylus it is really great to play shooters. Also Banjo can be perfectly played with the stylus. Maybe Kameo is too much asked, but if these 3 games will be launched for the Nintendo DS I will certainly buy them at the launchdate. These three games don't need advertising, they advertise themself.
     Keep up doing the good work and making the very good games!
     Paul van Dorst
  Personally I would kill for a DS Perfect Dark, don't mind if it is a port as long as you can control it like Goldeneye: RA DS or Metroid Prime: Hunters.
     I wouldn't like to see a Grabbed by the Ghoulies game for DS.
     
Fedde Kuilman
Mr. Pants says:
And who asked you, Dutch boy? Oh yeah, we did. And you're probably not even Dutch. I never was much good with names - that's what happens when your first name is [Censored in the public interest - Ed].
  Hi you freaky British sketch of a half-naked Charlie Chaplin with red underwear... eeer, sorry, I mean... hello, dear Mr. Pants!
     What Rare game would I like to see on the DS? Well, I suppose you did already dele-, uhm, read that e-mail I sent to Scribes some weeks ago, so you should know I'm a big fan of Rare's Donkey Kong games. Overall they had great gameplay, interesting characters, an excellent ambiance thanks to the high-quality music and graphics and were just somehow different from a certain plumber's adventures who plants his behind in nearly every Nintendo game.
     I believe that formula would still work today. After all, the re-releases of the first two DKCs were well appreciated and the third one is coming soon, too. Please develop a DK DS game! Nintendo and Namco can't convince me with their id-, er, innovative Kong projects, so I'd love seeing Rare getting the license for a DS title with the gorilla... Preferably in 3D, because there are already so many 2D DKs. Whatever, think about it, yeah? Thanks a lot!
     Prof. Link
  I bought a DS the day it came out and it's figgin awesome. With that said, I ABSOLUTELY NEED Banjo-Threeie and a port of Perfect Dark WITH online play. I would LOVE Rare again if you guys did those two. I might even buy a 360 just for PD0 if you guys did the port of PD. No promises though. And the DS is PERFECTLY suited for PD. The touch control for FPS's is AWESOME. The wireless connection is sweet and the graphics are around the N64 range. Gosh, I would just love you and send you money if you guys did that. And for Banjo Threeie, well, make sure it isn't a fetch quest. One last thing, ports of BK and BT wouldn't hurt either. I know that's a lot of requests but even if you did only one of those, I'd be soooooooooooooooo happy!
     Bluebomber7
     P.S. How about you guys work with Nintendo on Donkey Kong Racing? I would fly to Europe and give you all kisses and money if you did that! Maybe even my house!
Mr. Pants says:
That'd be figgin awesome! Especially finding a plane big enough to carry your house.
  Being an old gamer from the Spectrum days, I would like to see some of your classic games adapted to the DS touch control... Gunfright, Knight Lore, Atic Atac, Jetpac, Sabre Wulf, Underwurlde... you know, YES, a compilation of ALL your classic games!!!
     Cheerios,
     Carlos Mestre, Spain
  Dear Mr.Rare-Ware-Pants-Board-whatsever,
     I'd like to see a new Conker game (totally new). But of course with a few changes.
     The game must play as a platformer, like Bad Fur Day. The superb cut-scenes must stay of course. In Bad Fur Day you had to do some missions between the cut-scenes, what I'd like to see are two kinds of missions:
     -Platformer missions like in BFD.
     -Touch-screen puzzles (or mic puzzles), such as little mini-games or whatever (they can be made really funny). Or like at the end of a boss, you have to do a little touch-screen mini-game to defeat it. (Like cutting off the boss' head on the touch-screen or using the mic to blow the boss to the moon.)
     Also the 3rd person shooter part (which must be in it) can get really cool controls thanks to the touch-screen.
     I think that will be an awesome game! Also a multiplayer like in BFD would be very welcome ;)
     Theun (from the Netherlands)
  You programmed a lot of cool and funny games, but they always have been Jump N Runs or other usual genres. I would like to have a BEMANI game from you. Like Dance Dance Revolution, Pop'n Music or Beatmania.
     Music-games make a lot of fun and is very popular and booming... for example Daigasso Bandbrothers is a very good Bemani for the DS and there is another called Ouendan! which I will import from Japan to Austria. There are also great Bemani communities.
     Give yourself a try and pleaaaaaseeee create a Bemani... I think people would be very surprised to have a Bemani Game from RareWare... And I think a lot of people would buy it because it's from RareWare :)
     Alex
Mr. Pants says:
Austria, you say? Any place that names its cities after popular brands of chocolatey ice cream is cool beans by me. Sadly, I still have bad memories from the whole Pants Dants scandal. Those crazy fansite dudes! I bet they never even suspected it was me who slashed their tyres!
  I don't want to see Banjo on the DS. He should be Xbox only. The GBA Banjo games were just lacking. Please don't waste him again and just make a real game for the 360.
     Give us Battletoads on the DS or something cool like that. Maybe an Anticipation remake... with the stylus. Be creative.
     Jordan May
  DS titles I’d like to see from Rare:
     Perfect Dark (with online play, obviously)
     Jet Force Gemini (with co-op play, obviously)
     Blast Corps (plain vanilla will do just fine, obviously)
     Try to get them done before GBA2 comes out :)
     Cheers,
     Nick
  Snake. Rattle. And ROLL. You're a giant man wearing nothing but a bowler hat and (under)pants, you've never had to worry about losing the center of attention; these guys have been neglected and shat on for years, and never ONCE complained. Please, at least give them, like, a PORT or something. Or, failing that, you could always give Yellow Shirt Guy his own game. And I'd not be disappointed with a Battletoads port either.
     Thank you for your pants-time,
     Enter the Kiwi
Mr. Pants says:
Are we allowed to say 'shat on' in here? And who needs an ugly sod in a loud shirt when you have access to a brazen chunk of man-panted love steak like yours truly?
  After the thunderous success (in the bizarro world; a more applicable term for our dimension would be 'criminally overlooked') of the handheld team's efforts on the Game Boy Advance, there is one clear path to take for the DS. It's something both the hardcore DS audience and the most hardline Rare devotees could both get behind. It would be a guaranteed sales bonanza, finally shutting up prickly game magazines who have a vendetta against your company. It may take some behind-the-scenes doing, but the doing must be done.
     Donkey Kong Country 4. That's right. We're all clamoring for it. Heck, you could even make Kiddy Kong or Tiny Kong the star. It's not an issue. Just give us the game. The DKC ports sold like hotcakes or some other equally impressive cliché. They were the biggest selling games for your company this generation. The biggest selling Donkey Kong license games of this generation. Rare and Donkey Kong are great when they're separate, but put together? Peanut butter and chocolate. Perhaps to seal the deal you could send Nintendo a fruit basket? Or buy them new cars. It doesn't matter. It must be made at any cost, no matter the detriment to you.
     SirSlush2
       Rare, Rare, how I love you so
     I see you're back, supporting Nintendo
     What game would I like? Well that's hard to choose.
     I'll make you a list so I surely can't lose

     Where shall I start? There's so many to pick.
     How about that Squirrel with a thousand kicks.
     So what's up next, something a bit more tame
     A sequel to the bear & bird partnership fame

     How about a game that would shoot up high
     The one, the only, Jet Force Gemini
     Who could forget the final boss battle
     AH! I'm rattling off with my mindless prattle

     But this is a poem, for the love of Rare
     And their love for Nintendo so true and fair
     Oh what am I saying? Oh my, oh lord
     This better get printed on the Rare Pantsboard

     In conclusion I say, Make them all! Make them now!
     And give us a sequel to the best game around
     It's Banjo-Threeie, you know it, it's true
     I'll finish with saying - oh Rare - how I miss you.
     Ben Johnson
Mr. Pants says:
That reminds me of another Ben Jonson, the old English playwright. His stuff was pretty bad too, although I have to say he never stooped to "Squirrel with a thousand kicks". But hey - thanks for the sentiment, Benji!
  OK, DS games are needed. What would I like, you ask? Well I would like a Banjo-Threeie for the DS! Don't get me wrong, I'd still like a DK DS game, but let's stick with the rights you own for now. I dare say, you'll get enough requests for DKC4 or DKDS even without my vote. I'd like to say that Banjo-Threeie, or at least some Banjo game would be nice. I wouldn't mind an online Banjo Racing, either. I wouldn't doubt that it would be much better than MKDS. Finally, if you can get the rights for DK, you should definitely make DKC4.
     MasterDS
  Touch Screen! Cool! So if you do bring back an old classic, how're you going to incorporate the touch screen? PLEASE, I beg you: don't use it to move around!! Super Mario 64 and Rayman DS - I never use the Touch Screen to move! It's really just utterly pointless, I'm sorry. I think you should only use it when the focus is on that screen, like in mini-games and junk. 3)
     Bring Back Diddy! I loved Diddy Kong Racing; it's such a great game! Perfect to bring back! Yeah! (And on that note, I know you won't, but do not bring back Conker a second time. Just making sure...)
     Banjo-Threeie! Grunty's Revenge didn't count as Banjo-Threeie! I need more denouement! Sure, Grunty's been mutilated several times, and sure she doesn't have enough body parts left to keep being the villain in the series (trilogy! Trilogy!), but that doesn't mean you can't have another game! Give her a daughter, use her sisters, whatever! It's not too late! It isn't, really! Oh, oh, and Klungo could join forces with Banjo and Kazooie! They could be like a team! And why not bring back Stop n' Swop while you're at it?
     BATzerk
  Well, FPS games suits Nintendo DS perfectly so of course an online compatible version of Perfect Dark would be heaven. The single player game is really good and with touch-screen steering it will be better than the original. To assure that even more, add an online co-op and multiplayer and you got yourselves one helluva DS classic!
     Well, a new GOOD franchise wouldn't be wrong either, or Banjo-Kazooie, Tooie, Conker, Killer Instinct, Blast Corps (yeah, Blast Corps is my second choice after Perfect Dark)....
     Thanks, fellas.
     
Magnum
Mr. Pants says:
No, Mr. Selleck - thank you! You don't know what an honour it is for me to hear from you after all these years of following the furrow ploughed by your facial hair throughout the glorious 80s.
  First off I'm delighted you're working with the DS, I was crushed when you moved to Microsoft but oh well, doesn't matter anymore.
     The no. 1 game I would love to see would obviously have to be Perfect Dark (your best game ever in my opinion), I know the DS is not as powerful as the N64 and all that, but if anyone can do it you guys can (extra RAM in GBA slot maybe?). Back to reality though I have to say I'm itching for another Banjo game, I loved the GBA one (bit short though) and have been eagerly awaiting the next instalment since I saw the ending to Tooie, plus the series doesn't really suit Microsoft's "mature" audience anyway. Finally Diddy Kong Racing ruled, maybe a sequel using the Banjo license?
     Well that's all I have to rant about, I know whatever you come up with will be awesome, but please no more puzzle games, the DS has enough of them :)
     Metroidhead
  The best I could see on the DS must be Donkey Kong Country 4. Yeah, FOUR! Just a whole new side scrolling Kong Adventure... Would be great to go out with four monkeys on WiFi to clear the whole level. Like the new Super Mario Bros. 4 may be.
     Donkey, Diddy, Dixie and Kiddy... Would be my absolutely greatest wish (except for SMB4 maybe...).
     And I would not mind if the touch screen won't be used a lot... the DS still have all the buttons you need.
     Peter van de Beek
  Personally, I would pay for a cartridge that just explained what happened to Stop 'N' Swop. Either that or a multiplayer Mr. Pants FPS. Just imagine a dozen Mr. Pants, running around shooting each other in various locales. That would just rock.
     The Penquin
Mr. Pants says:
Man - can't you people just leave off the SNS? (By the way, the FPS will have to wait until after the MMORPG.)
  I know this probably won't happen, but I'll speak anyways. I'd really love to see a handheld version of Grabbed by the Ghoulies. On a handheld system I think it could do a lot better than on the Xbox (btw, I loved GBTG, it kicked major arse). Its fun and simple pick-up-and-play gameplay would work PERFECTLY for a handheld. And the touch screen could take the place of the right analog stick from the Xbox version.
     Well, I hope my feedback helped and I'm REALLY looking forward to Kameo and PDZ. Please let them pwn!
     Eric
  Specifically, (yes, I said spe-ci-fi-cal-ly) I'm hoping for a "complete" version of the original Banjo-Kazooie (one that maybe even combines the two N64 games). In fact why don't you do this instead of Banjo-Threeie (or at the very least include the plans for it into this game)? And of COURSE, we HAVE to have a DK64 remake (provided of course, that Nintendo asks you to make one), perhaps with some additional playable characters (or at least Dixie Kong, and Krusha on top of the other five)? Just one thing, no rubbish "DS" puns, please. Pretty please, with a cherry on top? I don't want a game called Donkey Kong: Dumb [and] Stupid.
     As a certain pig would say "Th-th-th-th-that's all folks!"
     Banjo the Donkey
Mr. Pants says:
Nintendo asking us to make stuff certainly does factor into it. Most people seemed to miss that one. Shame you went and spoiled the revelation with your filthy orgiastic inter-species Dixie/Kremling fantasies, deviant boy! Pigs and donkeys too? Lordy, my ticker!
  Snake Rattle 'N' Roll is one of my all time favorite games, even though it's only on older systems. If a sequel was created using the DS' unique features, I'm sure that it would become equally as timeless as the original game. GoldenEye and Jet Force Gemini both have large fan bases even to this day, so either a port, update or a sequel on to the DS would be sure to not only sell well, but also impress and delight gamers. I'd also like a Banjo-Kazooie because I still often play that innovative game on my Nintendo 64. Thanks.
     Logan P.
  Hmmmm, games I would love to see on the DS? I remember way back in the day when you guys weren't signed on with Microsoft yet, you had a project in the works for the Gamecube: Donkey Kong Racing. I remember seeing a video of it on this little demo disc and it looked so cool! I think it'd be a great idea to bring it to the DS especially now that it's going wi-fi in a few months.
     Also, a new Banjo would be sweet. And maybe even a whole new franchise. Is that too much to ask? Sorry but what can I say, I love you guys and your amazing games you develop, and knowing that you will be developing for the DS is awesome!
     Ursula Casanova
  No Donkey Kong. No Diddy Kong. No racing. No Banjo. No Tooie. No Conker. No Joanna.
     Battletoads would be neat-o. I would love a really good puzzle game, Meteos and Polarium both suck.
     ANTICIPATION! yes, I want to see Anticipation. Killer Instinct would be cool too.
     Jason Cooper
  Hi, Rare :)
     I like your proposal a lot. I would like to see games such as Perfect Dark on DS and Banjo-Kazooie, but above all the great Diddy Kong Racing, it's perfect for Nintendo DS and its touch screen.
     Thanks a lot :).
     
Jesus Rodriguez
Mr. Pants says:
I can see the headlines now! Jesus Demands DKR Remake! Who are we to argue with that?
  I'd love to see some ports of some of Rare's Nintendo 64 titles. I'd think that'd they would be easy to move onto the DS and could generate some capital for the company. Also, I'm sure fans would love a handheld version of Perfect Dark for the DS, with WiFi online multi-player using the Nintendo WiFi Connection. Personally, I would love handheld versions on Killer Instinct Gold, Blast Corps, Diddy Kong Racing, and Banjo-Kazooie/Tooie. There's so much potential here, especially since most believe that Rare was in its best form during the N64 days.
     Elias Dounis
  Nice to meet you. My name is Katen. I live in Japan.
     This news made me happy. because I like Banjo-Kazooie very much. The 2002 year's news made me sad. I thought that a Banjo-Kazooie cannot play in Japan. I like Banjo-Kazooie in all games. And, I want to play Banjo-Kazooie in NintendoDS. Because it can play Banjo-Kazooie in Japanese NintendoDS. I bought a Banjo-Kazooie of GBA on Internet. I like a Banjo-Kazooie that much.
     I continue supporting Rare. And, I wait for happy news.
     Katen
  So here's the plan - your guys write a N64 emulator for the DS that doesn't suffer any performance issues compared to the original hardware (and doesn't require us to fanny around with memory expansion units for higher resolution displays) and everyone's a winner!
     Off you go then!
     Kieron
     P.S. Please hide Knight Lore and Alien 8 as easter eggs in any of the games. And Jetpac too - I clocked that you know.
Mr. Pants says:
Everyone clocked Jetpac, you crazy honky - even me. On the other hand, the stress of trying to QWERT my way through Sabre Wulf caused my pants to swell to elephantine proportions.